Cheating at bingo is unethical and illegal, but that doesn’t stop certain people from trying to gain an unfair advantage at this popular game of chance. Bingo has been around for over a century, and the invention of the Internet has led to a renewed popularity in recent years. This means more individuals than ever are plotting ways to gain a payday without actually winning, which has resulted in bingo halls developing increasingly sophisticated methods for stopping and tracking down cheaters. Scottish playwright and poet Sir Walter Scott never played—or cheated—at the game, but he summed it up perfectly when he wrote “Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive!”
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Don’t Cheat at Bingo
Some individuals might read an article titled “Cheating at Bingo” and assume that I’m encouraging illegal activity. That’s not the case at all, and this section is included to give you a list of reasons why you shouldn’t engage in such actions, as well as to protect myself from any possible legal actions from disgruntled cheaters who get caught.
This article is intended solely for entertainment purposes. It’s meant to produce a chuckle or maybe allow you to fantasize about getting one over on the bingo hall. However, the actions described herein are meant to stay in the realm of fantasy, and anyone attempting them in real life is asking for all kinds of trouble. Here are some of the main reasons why:
Cheaters Never Prosper – Okay, cheaters do prosper sometimes in real life, but that doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get away with it. If you believe in the concept of karma, then you know that each action you perform in your life will have consequences. Bad actions will have negative results, even if you initially seem to get away with your crime. This may be a bit too philosophical for some, but why risk the wrath of the universe by cheating at bingo?
Internet Security – I have no idea how someone would go about hacking an online bingo site, but there are plenty of morally corrupt people who are more technologically proficient than I am. Unfortunately for them, online gaming sites (such as True Blue Bingo) employ the latest security measures to prevent unwanted intrusions. Sensitive information is encrypted, and any attempt at hacking is likely to result in the offender’s IP address being recorded. Unless you’re a genius-level hacker, the end result will be the coppers showing up at your door. Do you really want to serve a jail sentence for trying to break into a bingo website?
Land-Based Security – While online security measures are tough, they aren’t capable of throwing you to the ground or bloodying your nose. The same can’t be said of security at land-based bingo establishments. These frequently burly individuals take their jobs seriously, and they’re always on the lookout for players who might be up to something suspicious. If they catch you doing something you’re not supposed to, the best you can hope for is to be ejected from the premises. The most likely outcome, however, is that you’ll be detained while the police are called.
Prosecution Policy – Both virtual and land-based bingo parlours hate cheaters, and they go to great lengths to see that they’re punished for their transgressions. They always prosecute, and it’s an especially bad idea to steal from land-based establishments given their vast wealth and number of connections in the community. If and when you’re discovered, don’t expect to get off with a slap on the wrist, even if you’re a senior citizen.
Angry Patrons – When you resort to underhanded methods at bingo, you make it harder on the other players. Prices may be raised to cover losses, and even tighter security measures might be enacted. The customers won’t be happy about this, so you can expect them to deal harshly with anyone they discover cheating. I know someone who used to cheat at land-based halls on a pretty regular basis, and he’s told me stories about being screamed at, punched, and even spit on. I’ve never been beaten up by an old lady, and I have no intention of starting.
How to Cheat at Housie
Bingo is a simple game, but it’s also deceptively difficult to cheat at. The player’s side there’s only a collared ink blotter and printed tickets, so there aren’t many materials to work with. On the other side of things, there are either numbered balls or digits chosen electronically by a random number generator.
If most people were asked about the simplest way to cheat at bingo, I imagine they would suggest lying about the numbers. This might work in a game without oversight, but online and land-based bingo operations aren’t in the habit of taking people’s word. As soon as a player announces that they’ve won, the caller will check their winning numbers against the ones he’s drawn. More sophisticated halls accomplish this by feeding the ticket into a machine, while gaming sites automatically daub cards on your behalf.
A crooked caller would be a boon to any cheater, as this individual decides whether your winning card is legitimate or not. With the caller on your side, you could claim bingo or housie with any numbers, and then the caller could check your ticket and approve the numbers.
Counterfeit tickets are also another option, but these wouldn’t guarantee a win. Basically, you would have a number of extra tickets that you didn’t pay for, and you could look through them to find one with several matches. Of course, you run the risk of being spotted by security or other players, so this is far from ideal. Plus, exactly how are you going to duplicate the ticket’s specific brand of paper and unique casino security mark?
Cheating at bingo is a bad idea, but there’s always some desperate soul willing to give it a try. However, the game is surprisingly difficulty to subvert, and those who make the attempt often find themselves in a great amount of legal trouble. While it may seem like an easy way to pocket a few dollars, the risks far outweigh the rewards. Your best bet is to find a favourite land-based hall or virtual bingo parlour and do things fair dinkum.